lately when i've experienced feelings of excitement over something, interest in something, joy, wonder, a spark of any kind, my thoughts have gone from that feeling to the idea that i want to feel that way about my relationship with God. did he not make me to feel these things? and i'm sure it isn't for the purpose of spending all of it on things of this earth, things in my little circle of concern. i want to know him as He knows himself, know him in His art of creation, His greatness and glory, His sacrificial love for me. i want to be excited about knowing Him, desiring to spend time with Him. Our kids are into these max lucado books right now - you are mine, you are special, and most recently, if i only had a green nose. these stories deal with a wooden puppet living in a town filled with wooden puppets, most of whom spend all their time trying to outdo each other in coolness and belonging via the latest fad. eli, the woodcarver who made them all, lives up a hill outside of the town and is generally feared scornfully by the 'wemmicks'. punchinello, the main character, goes to eli initially to meet him, and then sporadically throughout the other books as he's in need of rescuing...but other than those times is busy getting caught up in the popularity contests at quite a high price to himself every time. as i read these stories to my kids, i am wondering why little punchinello doesn't just spend more time at eli's - he's so much more levelheaded and feeling peace when he's at the woodcarvers shop. the time he wastes in town listening to lost wemmicks he exhibits foolishness and pride and ends up burned, lost and lonely every time. it's a beautiful picture of how we are, it's so simple and straightforward. i want to get off the hamster wheel for good, i want to know it's ok to do that. i want rest in my body and peace in my head. i'm so thankful that that's what He wants for me, too...i just have a lot of trouble remembering this in the thick of daily life.