morning wakes my bleary vision
getting up's a tough decision
stayed up late, but that's my nature
grouchy start the next day's wager
overwhelmed and late already
on my feet i'm barely steady
coffee brewing, cereal poured
warm bed tempts, i can't afford
to give it even one more thought
this is the kind of start i bought
but does it have to spoil the day?
i know it started out that way, but
help me Lord, to overcome
feeling tired, draggy, numb
show your strength despite my weakness
radiate my outer bleakness
grace you show me, kind and true
when even my foolishness you work through.

yesterday was deepening grey and foggy, misty and somewhere between cool and warm - my absolute favorite weather. i need to live in the pacific northwest. but alas, instead of wishing away my morning i started the daunting task of cleaning out my garage and chopped all of my perennials down to barely there. i just had to be outside, it was surreal, it was a grey green gift to my senses from my heavenly Father, who makes all things bright and beautiful, who owns the cattle on a thousand hills, and who knows my own heart much better than i ever could. i was just breathing in the comfort, it was a whisper in my ear from my Abba, i could've stayed there for a year. hopefully it is a glimpse of what spring is going to look like in kansas - if so, i can't wait.

having read anne lamott's entire body of work in the last few months, here's my current reads/ to be read asap (read: when i have time) list...
ruthless trust - brennan manning
a womans answer to anger - annie chapman
the way they learn - cynthia ulrich tobias
where is God when it hurts? - philip yancy
the italian cooking encyclopedia
listening to your life - frederick buechner
...and the grinning skim through the current family fun magazine.

i just wish i had the lazy afternoons, the late nights with flashlights time i used to have to read. it takes much more discipline these days...